Eating a Zombie: Zombivores
We all have met Vegetarians.
Some people are unabashed, and fully disclosed they’re full fledged Carnivores.
Frugivores are certainly common – among bird species that is.
You won’t find a section at your local grocery store that says Insectivores. But there are mammalian and reptilian species that wished there was a section at their local grocers that had nothing but succulent, plump insects.
Herbs are wonderful when you’re cooking, but we leave the strict Herbivore diet to our hoof friends – deer, horses, and cows.
Most humans in the world are Omnivores. We humans like our veggies and meats.
No one mind you, and I mean no one, is going to say they’re a Zombivore. Isn’t that remarkable? Of course, zombie-folks are hard to come by.
We’ve all read or seen a zombie tale, if you haven’t, then it’s quite miraculous you’re reading this blog! But let me educate the unlikely people who are reading this post, but are not yet informed on the zombie world.
Look peeps, zombies eat flesh, that’s just their thing.
Throw a dart, and more likely than not it’ll hit a work of literature or film that depicts zombies starving for bloodied guts and organs.
Their teeth may be rotting and falling out but that doesn’t stop them. They love to pluck their greedy fingers into human tissue and pull as hard as they can. They’ll bare their jaws down into that flesh and rip. Oops, loss a tooth on that one.
In recent times, there’s been a shift. Undead no longer like long drawn out meals apparently. No, in modern day, zombies are like us. They are on the go and looking for a drive-thru.
It’s true, you are likely to meet a zombie in our modern era who is rushed and has no time to smell the flowers. Good luck trying to tell them they are missing out on a full meal of raw, bloody tendrilly flesh.
All in all, the zombies of our modern world gravitate towards live humans, usually to infect them. One thing is clear, zombies do not eat zombies. Noooo Sir. You tell me the last time you witnessed a zombie eating one of their own? Seriously.
The Zombies, I’m guessing, have some type of code that cause them to never fall into cannibalism. Or do we call it zannibalism?
Boy, if they didn’t have this code, they would have much an easier time of catching food.
Nevertheless, you have to hand it to them, the zombies keep to this code which even the humans can’t do.
We humans are like pigs I guess. Sorry to say folks but we humans have an established history of engaging in cannibalism. History shows us that from the Amazon basin to New Zealand there have people who have pitted humans over a fire and then eaten them like a roasted rabbit.
During times of famines it’s the same deal. Humans start looking quite tasty. The Road by Cormac McCarthy gave us a post-apocalyptic look at cannibalism.
You can be sure the next time we have famine your next door neighbor will be setting out his fine silverware. He’ll just be trying to figure out how to catch his main course – you.
In the end, Undead don’t eat each other though. Nope. That would be too crude. But that brings us to the next point.
What exactly does eat a zombie?
I always thought everyone was a potential food source, right? But zombies are not known to be nutritious. They are rotten, corroded, smelly, and disgusting.
But wouldn’t it be cool to eat a zombie? I’m just saying. No one ever has – Ever. Well, why the hell not?
Ok, so we know if we eat something rotten, decayed, putrid, we’re going to be infected by bacteria and have a nice, gut wrenching death.
So, ok, that means we need a digestive system that can easily digest this rotten meat.
Perhaps, an alien creature?
Ah, yes, now we’re onto something.
Imagine the world overpopulated with your greatest desire that is for the taking. Let it be your favorite looking guy or girls if you’re into them, or heck, let it be food, and stick yourself in this haven. Mmmm … Amen to that brother!
Amen, above all, savors the scent of rot in the morning!
And by the way, Amen has known to take his time when he eats. After all, we should all enjoy our savory meals.
Let’s all give a loud …
Amen to rot!
Bryce is the author of the Sci-Fi/ Dark Fantasy series Amen to ROT. A four series that goes beyond Undead, but takes us into a dark, sinister alien world that is using humans on Earth as raw resources to build a new army. He’s also the author of the upcoming novel, Nyte God, the background of which is based on the four part Amen to Rot series.